12 Quotes From Funny People About the Internet

Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Give a man Twitter, and he will forget to eat and starve to death.

I didn't know what Facebook was, and now that I do know what it is, I have to say, it sounds like a huge waste of time. I would never say the people on it are losers, but that's only because I'm polite. Needless to say, we didn't have Facebook when I was growing up. We had phonebook, but you wouldn't waste an afternoon with it.

Can we go back to using Facebook for what it was originally for - looking up exes to see how fat they got?

The population of earth has reached 7 billion people, every single one of whom send you irritating emails to join something called “LinkedIn.”

Human beings are human beings. They say what they want, don't they? They used to say it across the fence while they were hanging wash. Now they just say it on the Internet.

Way, way back in the day, like in the 1990s, if you wanted to tell everyone you ate waffles for breakfast, you couldn’t just go on the Internet and tweet it out. There was only one way to do it. You had to go outside and scream at the top of your lungs, 'I ate waffles for breakfast!' That’s why so many people ended up in institutions. They seemed crazy, but when you think about it, they were just ahead of their time.

Compulsive texting gives me the willies. It’s just another form of butt scratching.

I love the Internet, and I love that you can say whatever you want.

The Internet is just a world passing around notes in a classroom.

Look at the walls of Pompeii. That's what got the internet started.

If you ever start to feel too good about yourself, they have this thing called the Internet, and you can find a lot of people there who don't like you.

Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with the internet.