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Updated by Marcia Riefer Johnston on Dec 02, 2014
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Marcia Riefer Johnston Marcia Riefer Johnston
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Pun Fun

Listly by Marcia Riefer Johnston

Groanworthy wordplay. Add your favorite puns!

1

I tried to catch some fog. I mist.

9

I'm reading a book about antigravity. I can't put it down.

12

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

25

Need an ark? I Noah a guy.

2

When chemists die, they barium.

3

A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is a seasoned veteran.

4

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

5

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop anytime.

6

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

7

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

8

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

10

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

11

They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type O.

13

PMS jokes aren't funny. Period.

14

Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.

15

Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.

16

Energizer Bunny arrested: charged with battery.

17

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

18

How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it.

19

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

20

When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

21

What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.

22

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me!

23

Broken pencils are pointless.

24

I got fired from the orange-juice factory. I couldn't concentrate, so I got canned.