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Updated by Jennifer Villamere on May 17, 2014
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Who the fuck is Ariana Grande?

Whoever she is, she's a thing now. If you're 1,000 years old like me and need a primer on stuff that is a thing now, here's a list of stuff about Ariana Grande.

1

She used to be on TV

She used to be on TV

She was on some Nickelodeon show called Victorious from 2010 to 2013. Then there was a spinoff of that show called Sam & Cat and she was on that, too.

2

She's from Florida

She's from Florida

She grew up in Boca Raton, Florida, presumably close to the Costanzas of Del Boca Vista. (All my Florida info is based on news reports of crazy Floridians and Seinfeld. Sorry, Florida!)

3

She put out her first album last March

She put out her first album last March

The album, The Way, received "critical acclaim" and debuted at number one on the Billboard 200.

I know, right? You're, like, how come I've never heard of this person? Answer: you're over 20.

4

The lead single from her new album just dropped

The lead single from her new album just dropped

She premiered the song Problem at the 2014 Radio Disney Music Awards, whatever that is.

Is any of this even real? Do you feel like you've been hiding in your laundry room for the past four years just washing and folding and maybe just taking a break sometimes to eat pasta but never absorbing any pop culture whatsoever?

Fucking laundry, eh?

Anyway, the new song features Australian rapper Iggy Azalea.

5

She has a for real huge vocal range

She has a for real huge vocal range

She's got a four octave range, which is major. People are all, like, "Oh my God, she's the next Mariah Carey!"

Whoever that is. LOL JK OMG ROFLMAO #YOLO, etc., etc.

6

She used to be banging some guy from The Wanted, which is that boy band that's not One Direction

She used to be banging some guy from The Wanted, which is that boy band that's not One Direction

Wake me up when we're talking about Harry Styles.

7

She looks 9 but she's actually 20

She looks 9 but she's actually 20

So that's good, considering those non-pants. Still, you're a pervert.

8

Stars' response to her performance made headline (non) news

Stars' response to her performance made headline (non) news

She performed at the iHeartRadio Music Awards the other night. Crowd shots during her two-song medley showed Rihanna laughing at her dancing and Luke Bryan and Blake Shelton looking confused/unimpressed.

Stop. The. Motherfucking. Presses. Bitch.

I'm with Ri-Ri because the dance routine was awkward, oddly prim, stiff and featured tired choreography. My televised dance routines are much, much fiercer.

Check out her performance [here](http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x1sj4ji_ariana-grande-performs-iheartradio-music-awards_music).