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Updated by Fusion 360 on Apr 29, 2014
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People That Will Put You To Sleep

These public figures and dignitaries are so boring they must be poked at with a stick to confirm their consciousness.

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People That Will Put You To Sleep

People That Will Put You To Sleep

Some people manage to make it into the public eye while also forcing it shut. If this isn’t ironic enough, the list below will help reopen your eyes to the somnolence they have spread throughout our country. If you’re a victim of sleep deprivation, look no further. Here is a list of people that will put you right to sleep, instantly curing your chronic sleep deprivation.

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Nobel Laureate J.M. Coetzee

Nobel Laureate J.M. Coetzee

His novels are nothing less than gyrating cesspools of human suffering and depression, and his physical presence is equally damper. Someone said that he laughed once, but physical evidence of this is less available than Big Foot playing bongo drums.

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Tom Hanks

Tom Hanks

One cannot help but wonder if Hanks’ role as Forrest Gump was less his stab at portraying a mentally challenged character and more him being his true, listless self.

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Alan Rickman

Alan Rickman

Seth MacFarlane leaves no comedic stone unturned, and his depiction of Rickman as a man who leaves himself voicemail messages on his own phone is as fitting as it is hilarious.

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Barack Obama

Barack Obama

Although his onerous duty of upholding presidential images is merely a responsibility, it is easy to see how the role has consumed him. Within two years of entering the white house, sleep deprivation and grizzled hair set in while the basketball court remained untouched.

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Kanye West

Kanye West

College Dropout Kanye was worth talking about. But now everything he says is some variant of “I’m a genius, I just don’t get it.”

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Victoria Beckham

Victoria Beckham

A series of photographs more than a sentient human being, this ex spice girl has seen better and perhaps more interesting days.

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Jonathan Franzen

Jonathan Franzen

Yet another writer makes the list. This guy can be seen in major newspaper publications either whining about technology or devising foolhardy arguments about the downfalls of generation Y. He’s living proof an iconoclast need not be interesting.

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Newt Gingrich

Newt Gingrich

A walking embodiment of everything that’s wrong with culture, politics and the direction of American idealism, Gingrich’s racist antics are as shameful as they are outplayed. Thankfully his boring persona occupies no important place in the world of politics anymore.

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Author Bio

Author Bio

James O’Connor is a writer at Fusion 360, an advertising agency in Utah. He writes content for many businesses in the valley, including Sleep Genius.

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