Adulting: The Brutal Truths That You’ll Learn in Your Twenties

You spent your entire youth being told that being ‘cool’ consisted on being rebellious, drinking and answering back. Then as soon as you head out into the adult world, these things are no longer cool? Wait what? No. Being kind, successful and happy are now the in thing. I didn't prepare for this

Gone are the days when you relied on your parent’s pay check to fill your plate and put toilet roll in the bathroom. It’s up to you now. Get ready to start spending your hard earned cash on cleaning products, toiletries and food! Ugh.

You know those buddies that you thought you would be in contact with forever? Yeah, well now you’re not. And do you know what? Life just goes on.

Making your own food, packed lunches, breakfasts and dinners isn’t as fun as you thought it would be. Where is you mum when you need her? Oh yeah….you moved out. Start getting used to making your own meals, buddy!

Yep. That 10% New Look discount that you never used? You can no longer use it. At least there are delivery discount codes and deals that you can find online (if you can be bothered).

If you are still in your early twenties then ignore this one, but if you are a little older then you must know what I mean. Three day hangover? No thanks! Being surrounded by over excited eighteen year olds in the club? I’ll pass!

Starting to miss living under your parents roof yet? Well you should! Rent nowadays is absolutely extortionate! Most of your paycheck will be absorbed into somone elses pocket each month. Get used to it.

When at university we think ‘oh golly, isn't it hard being an adult! Going out on the piss every night and avoiding lectures with a vengeance while somehow still coming out with 2:1s sure is exhausting!’ ……. No, just no.

If you went to university then you had the luxury of being council tax exempt for three precious years. Boy is that a hard one to come to terms with afterwards. For those of you with your parents, you might not have had to pay rent thus far! You’re in for a surprise.

You just get to a point, okay? Somewhere between being a teenager and being in your mid twenties, you will stop giving so much of a sh** what people think of you. This is a good thing, trust me…

Growing up and learning about socially acceptable behaviour and, well, life, makes you realise how much of a hard time you gave your parents. This is a tricky one to handle, but let's face it, we were all dicks to our parents when we were sixteen.

You don't have to be out on the piss every night to have a good time. Some of us would actually prefer to sit around in our joggers playing the playstation and eating day old pizza, okay?

That's right, life isn't all about you. As you grow up you’ll start noticing the glazed over look in peoples eyes as soon as you start talking about yourself. No one cares. Just ask them questions about them and prey the small talk will be over soon.

You know those kids in school that everyone thought were nerds? Yeah, they are the ones laughing now. Most likely, they have nice houses, high paying jobs and progressive careers. Not a nerd anymore, eh?

Yeah, they do! When we are young we think that everything is just going to work out for us. This is not the case. Apparently, those people with better grades, better degrees and better education actually end up with the better jobs. Who’d have thought it?

Remember sleeping on your mates wooden floor when you were younger, bouncing up the next day and feeling right as rain? Not anymore. Getting up too quickly will give you a bad neck now! Maybe it’s time to start exercising? Maybe not...

Everyone and their uncle will start popping kids out (maybe not their uncles), and when someone tells you that they are pregnant, the correct response is no longer ‘are you gonna keep it?’ We’re not fifteen anymore...

There were so many things that you were going to do with your life but now, quite suddenly, it feels like there is not enough time. How am I supposed to fit skydiving in when I have a full time job and six seasons of Friends left to watch?

It's great being able to see your family, but have you noticed that your presents have been getting smaller and smaller as the years go on? And now you are expected to pay more and more for other people? What happened to the magic of Christmas? Now we just dred the commercialised, materialistic and wasteful nature of its manifestation. Help!

Something embarrassing happen? It is now your most amazing anecdote. Gone are the days of playing yourself off as cool and collected, the more embarrassing your life is, the more people like hearing your stories. Self deprecation is king.