Expedition Self
Wanting to be the artist and creator of having more intimacy in life. These are 10 ways to think, conversation starters and actions that you can take to make it happen.
Being right often means much more to our sense of identity than being profoundly related to another human being - which creates a deeper sense of Self.
Oh... this is a hard one! It's more than just relating from your experience. Their world has to be truly related to as you imagine yourself being "them" and why their perspective, position or feelings actually make sense or are valid.
This one\'s important. Own up, share and reveal things you\'ve been keeping to yourself, thoughts you\'ve had that seemed too private and parts of yourself that you think give others power or room to judge you.
When we assume real responsibility for how it goes in a relationship we\'re able to let them \"off the hook\" - from our expectations, feelings & reactions.
So often we begin to withhold as a way of managing hurt and resentment - being committed to sharing and talking things through guarantees a new level of intimacy.
So much of the act of creation begins with choosing, committing and engaging our intention. The minute you truly you decide you want more intimacy, you\'ll start seeing the little things that interfere with you having it.
Resentment, Hurt, Disappointment, Betrayal and Jealousy are often legitimate reasons to start protecting ourselves. What we don\'t realize is that a closed heart is a sure way to begin limiting intimacy and ultimately to ending or shutting down in relationship.
We don\'t like to feel - this translates into blaming the other person for making us feel when we don\'t want to and judging them in some way for being the source of those lousy feelings. The most important way to deepen intimacy is to stop blaming and judging the other person for their impact on your psyche.
Sometimes it doesn\'t feel safe and other times we just don\'t realize it matters - but our history can make a huge difference in weaving a more intimate space for us to operate within. The side benefit is that this \"space\" also encourages us to explore and understand the other person\'s life story, too. It\'s a win-win.
We make the assumption that once someone knows they matter to us - that it\'s just accepted as true. But bringing it to life, riding the wave of intimacy means that we share new insights and slivers of the very special way that the other person makes a difference. It helps them realize that they matter and they make a difference for you.
