Brianna Cerkiewicz
I always wonder how much internet quizzes really reveal about me—if I'm Spock, Mark from Love Actually, and the colour black, maybe there is a nugget of psychological validity in there—or at least a reason why all of my relationships have so far failed. But other times, I have to wonder what quiz results say about my soul...
Where words fail, typography speaks...
Serifs are obviously sexy, and wingdings scream crazy, but how exactly is my favourite dance move related to "Times New Roman"? I suppose that the "pick a celestial body" question might coax out my inner astronomer—plus three intelligence points for knowing what Ganymede is—which makes me Futura, obviously, because nothing says smart like sans-serif. And if you got Comic Sans—the most universally hated font ever—well... maybe your favourite body part shouldn't have been forearms.
This quiz can also be used to evaluate how many badgers, weasels, and other small, vicious animals you could take (not kidding—that's a question). The ability to high-kick and a strong stomach for violence will up your score, while a weakness for catchy tunes will leave you a victim of the Bieber swarm.
I guess this one's not that weird—spirit animals are a thing—but are famous turtles a thing? Apparently. Some famous turtles turtles prefer lollipops, while others LOVE strawberries, and some enjoy Bieber (if you get this turtle, you probably failed the quiz above). And I guess there's a pretty big personality difference between Franklin-from-children's-books and bad-guy Bowser... but what does it mean if I got a snail?
"I bet you didn't even know you were a kind of pocket!" tempts the quiz. Very true... I'm introverted, get ready quickly in the morning, love The Wind in the Willows and All Out of Love, and dark movies are my thing... so obviously I'm a pants pocket. I guess it's dark in there... like the inside of any pocket. I also keep things hidden away... again, like all pockets.
Are you a "mouse in drag" or "horse missing a joint in one leg"? The questions and results are mystifying—but the hilariously bad taxidermy photos are worth it.
